Faking It: Anatomy of a Sexy Selfie

Girl in the mirror by Luis Quiles. © Gunsmithcat (Luis Guiles)

Girl in the mirror by Luis Quiles facebook.com/luisquilesart

I always feel like if I don’t look a certain way, if boys don’t think I’m ‘sexy’ or ‘hot’ then I’ve failed . . .
—15-year-old girl’s submission to the Everyday Sexism Project
Whenever I would post a picture just like showing like a little bit of cleavage or something . . . I would get more likes, more comments
. . . and then a more seductive picture, I would get hundreds of likes, hundreds of comments. . . . it makes you feel like a Kardashian, all the attention that you get.
—18-year-old Magen, on posting sexy selfies
Hey, look at me! Look at me! Look at me! . . . Will he think I’m sexy enough? ―Emilie Autumn 



A how-to for girls who take their cues from pouting, naked celebrities (read: cleavage = attention = love).


Something skimpy, something tight
Make sure that your makeup’s right

Smooth your hair and tuck your chin
Look up through your eyelashes

With wide eyes and practiced pout
(Let your inner sexy baby out)

For better cleavage, best lean in
Cock your hip to look more slim

Forget the gazes of your teachers,
Future bosses, friends, and lovers
Family, even future children
(Chances are they’ll never see them)

Seduce the camera
Pretend the lens
Is voracious, approving
(the ideal friend)

Shoot and critique (and sometimes delete)
Shoot and critique (and sometimes delete)
Shoot and critique (and sometimes delete)





One Comment:

  1. It is a sorry state when selfies are unbecoming snapshots, instead of a memory to be proud of and look back on with smiles. Girls need boosts to their self-esteem beginning early in life with positive feedback from caregivers, teachers, mentors, culture, and media, that highlights and reinforces skills, self-worth, and behavior that promotes healthy self images. Maybe then the ‘sexy selfie’ (seeking validation from others) will become a thing of the past, and self worth will instead correspond with one’s integrity, ability to set goals, and state of well-being.

What do you think?